Florida? Ya sure, you betcha!

Embrace the unexpected.  The things we never saw coming often take us to the places we never imagined we could go. - Unknown


Last fall we had a serious discussion about the possibility of moving out of state. Again, at times I think we both thought, "Well maybe, if the right thing popped up."   So as we were discussing the possibility of moving, Mike was contacted by the leader of the United Church of Christ for the Florida conference saying she thought his profile (resume) would be a good fit for a church with an opening in Dunedin, Florida. So Mike did a little research for we both said, "Where's Dunedin AND how to you pronounce that? Well, Dunedin is located just north of Clearwater on the Gulf coast side of Florida and it is pronounced DONE-EE-DIN.  The other thing that struck us - it is a little Scottish town.  How fitting for Michael MacMillan!

The process for finding the best pastor for a church is not a simple or quick process.  I always explained to people that as much as a church is interviewing the pastor, the pastor is also interviewing the church.  This is no small commitment for both pastor and church - it all needs to work just right.  With the possibility of moving out of state it also became a very serious family decision for us as well. 

If you know anything about Minnesotans it is that they do not often leave their homeland and when they do it tends to cause quite a commotion.  Mike and I were both born and raised in the land of 10,000 lakes (and mosquitoes!).  We were a part of a generation that had lived in just one house our entire lives before going off to college.  Even throughout the "experimental years" we were never too far from our original homes or at least when we were it was very temporary.   It was a comfortable and lovely life.  There are times when I am sure myself, Mike and even others would say - why change that?  Our best answer,  because we could and wanted to. 

I think that a lot of my personal yoga practice over the years and a wealth of amazing yoga teachers that have surrounded me thus far in my life have helped me realize that nothing is permanent - that we should strive to embrace change.  I find that the most unhappy people in this world are the ones not willing to change.  I see it everyday in my career field.  People are unhappy if one class time gets changed to another day, or God forbid, just by 5 minutes.  Or how about the person that wants to loose weight but refuses to change their diet and exercise habits.  Hmm, good luck with that goal. 

So as we made our decision to embark on this gigantic life - change, we needed to start letting go of things that would hold us back.  It brought to mind the Yoga Sutra of vairagya, non- attachment. Vairagya is learning to let go of the many attachments, aversions, fears, and false identities that are clouding the true Self. I think this is one of the hardest concepts to embrace.  

I can say that moving out of state and downsizing was one of the best things for my body, mind and spirit.  We were forced to get rid of things, and oh what a relief.  I have noticed that the less I have with regards to possessions, the more time I have, which is truly precious.

This is not to say that I have not struggled with some of this over the past few months.  I think the biggest obstacle was how this was going to affect my children.  I think the "mommy guilt" was the hardest thing for me to let go of.  Even though our girls are 5 and 7, I still see them as little babies, my little babies.  At this point in my kid's lives, Minnesota, their house in Richfield, their little friends down the street, their aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents were all that they knew and it was safe.  Was I willing to take them away from that safety net?  Heck, this was really all I had ever known, was I willing to do the same for myself?

So as we got closer to the idea of actually packing up and moving out of state the process of letting go was staring us right in the face.  Were we really going to do this?  Could we, but more importantly I think I kept saying, should we?  I had lived my entire first 34 years of my life in Minnesota.  I had seen my neighborhood change over the years - I was a part of that and now I was just going to pack up and leave it?  Well, the obvious answer is yes but it did take some time.

I can say with all honesty that my husband was the best choice for this congregation that we are now a part of in Dunedin.  I have always thought that he is one of the most intelligent and brilliant men I have ever and will ever know but I think this congregation sees it as well.  Mike came down here last winter to interview and I had no doubt he would impress.  The biggest factor for us was would it be something we wanted as well? 

So in early May we packed up the whole family and flew down to Florida.  It had so many elements of excitement for us.  The girls got to experience their first plane ride, seeing Florida and of course the possibility was there for us all that this just might become our new home.  What made the trip so awesome were not just the fantastic sunny days, powder white beaches but the welcoming embrace from our possible new church.

We spent many days engulfed in Mike's career opportunity but we also had to decide if it would all really work for us.  So we visited a school for the girls, found a place where we could live and even a job for me.  It meant so much that I could move from one YMCA to another - still having that community outlet that I knew we would all need. 

As I think back to the process of letting go, the getting rid of clutter and material things was not really that big of deal to me, it was letting go of the people around me.  Over time we do not realize how much a person means to us until they are not quite as accessible as they used to be.  I knew it was going to be hard to not have my parents close by, not have my kids see their family members in person as often, this was the hardest part of leaving.  I knew we were not saying goodbye forever but more so saying "see you soon."

There are days that are harder than others.  Days when I really miss my mom and dad, my sisters and brothers, friends and old co-workers.  The practice of non-attachment helps me through all those sad feelings for I know that even if I cannot physically embrace these people, I can pick up the phone, Skype, text, email or even meditate. Nothing is permanent and every day is moving forward to the next one.  I also know that if I really need to see any one of these people, there is nothing stopping me from getting on a plane and heading back to good old MPLS - well, maybe below zero temps and blizzards!

So as we head into this fall season where in Minnesota we really do see the physical changes of Mother Nature, we will embrace our new autumn season in Florida.  We will enjoy our local farmers markets that thrive all year round.  We get to wear shorts and flip flops all year - maybe the occasional sweatshirt for those chilly days of 60 degrees.  Sunshine calls our name everyday (361 days to be exact) and it is so pleasant.  We have so many beaches to try out, amusement parks to have fun at and time to simply enjoy this new journey.

We will always be rooted in Minnesota but our branches are sure soaking up the salt water and sun!

May the sun that shines on my face shine on yours as well.

Namaste.

 

 

 

The year of "firsts"

Moving into the next phase of your life is a lot like crossing monkey bars.  You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.  - Unknown


I have been grappling with a few different blog posts over the past few weeks and just could not come to terms with what to post next.  The process of change has been ever-present in my life for the last few months and what better way to incorporate this process than to discuss yet another year gone by or as today would entail - one year older. 


If you look close in the sky, the Coast Guard came out special for my birthday!

So today I turn 35 years old.
35.
Yawn.

I have been feeling a bit down these past few days and I know it has nothing to do with the number 35. I always joke that I am like the clothing store, "Forever 21." I do not think about age in terms of a number but more an experience - the way one really feels. I like to think that I feel healthy and alive.

So what is making me a little blue this birthday season? Well, this is the first birthday ever in my life where I am not in Minnesota. Can you imagine?  My first 34 birthdays were all celebrated in Minnesota? 

I have always loved my birthday - I will admit it. I like to celebrate me. I tend to blame my narcissism on the fact that I am the youngest of seven children and still to this day thrive off of attention. It makes sense. I loved being on stage as a kid and young adult.  Then, I ended up making a career out of getting up in front of people and instructing them on how to exercise. Many would think that this is crazy but to me it is just pure awesome. 
 
Now, I am very aware that my birthday celebrations have evolved over the years.  I left the bar scene right around the time I had my first baby (or maybe I just limited my bar time once I had a baby).  Other things became more important - it was more about getting together with family and close friends. Recently birthdays have even simply been about taking time for me.

So after talking with my sister a few nights ago it got me thinking about what is really going on here.  No, I am not worried that I am growing old, I actually take aging as a challenge (that is a whole other post) but I realized that this is going to be a year of "firsts" for me and my whole family.

Changes have been happening left and right; they have not stopped or even slowed down since we arrived on the Suncoast.  I am still amazed at how calm we have been for the most part with everything that we have gone through over the past few months.  Some of these changes have been challenging but for the most part they have been exciting.  I think that there will be many more exciting "firsts" but the ones like birthdays and holidays will be bittersweet. 

So as I embark on this here birthday, I started to think about how some of the Ten Living Principles of Yoga could guide me through this first "firsts."  The Ten Living Principles are broken up into Yamas (Don'ts) and Niyamas (Do's).  There are two that seem to guide me through my thoughts and emotions at this present time.

First, would be the Yama of Aparigraha.  Aparigraha is defined as not grasping.  We get attached or comfortable to a way of life, the way it should be and basically live our lives around that idea or process.  This would be fine if life were indeed a standard event in which nothing ever changed; but life does change, and it demands that we adapt and change with it.  Many of the teachings in yoga philosophy tell us that nothing in life is permanent. Life would be much easier and substantially less painful if we lived with the knowledge of impermanence as the only constant. Many of us have learned the hard way that if we hold onto anything too tightly we almost always loose it (this applies to objects, ideas and people). Our best option then lies in breaking down the barriers, letting go of what we think we need to hold onto and allowing ourselves to grow. It is through that letting go that we become more resilient.

The second principle would be the Niyama of Santosha.  Santosha means contentment or the practice of contentment.  I thought this fit perfectly with where I am at this given time for the practice of contentment is about having the ability to feel satisfied within one's own immediate experience.  Now, this does not necessarily mean happiness for there are going to be times in life where we are not fully happy but we can be content.  I like to think that it means we are at peace with where we are at any given stage in our lives. 

So, I guess that means I need to let go of the way it has been for the last 34 years and go out and celebrate my birthday Florida style.  No expectations, just to live in this current moment at this current time.  I need to be satisfied with where I am at this given time and realize that life is ever changing.  So, I decided to make this day a little about me with a lot about our new surroundings and our family that is also experiencing these "firsts" as well.

I spent time on Skype this morning with my niece who is about to move from Sweden to Korea - wow!  Talk about a huge change and she is just going for it.  Way to go April!

I had the honor to spend a good chunk of the day frolicking on Clearwater Beach with my amazing husband.  It was like the G rated version of  the beach scene from the movie "From Here to Eternity."

I finished my day watching my kids swim at sunset in the ocean (yes, I was at the beach twice in one day - priceless) and then ate a Dairy Queen ice cream cone on the ride home.  It was everything and nothing like how I thought my birthday should be like and it was great.  I think I could get used to this beach birthday celebrating but I will strive to remember that life is always shifting.

I once heard this spoken in a yoga class, "Always let go, never give up."  This shall be my mantra for this coming year of "firsts." 

May the light in me honor the light in you,

Namaste


P.S. If you like music to groove you, these two songs really seem to "sing" to me at this given time. Plus, they are just plain catchy. Enjoy!

"Knee Deep" by The Zac Brown Band: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gbxf0WWSROk

"My next thirty years" by Tim McGraw: http://youtu.be/NoR78-PomKc